Episode 60: Finding Your Way Through Grief with Chamoda Palmore

During this episode of This Thing Called Life, host Andi Johnson speaks with Chamoda Palmore, a father to a son that was fatally injured in a motorcycle accident on his way to football practice in 2014. As a man, Chamoda knows that he might grieve differently than other people, but as someone going through his own journey of grief, he knows it’s important to find a way to grieve.

 

Episode Highlights: 

 

• Chamoda is a business owner that lost his son, Chamoda Kennedy-Palmore, to a motorcycle accident.
• Throughout his journey of grief, Chamoda has experienced a rollercoaster of emotions.
• It takes a lot of patience to get through the grieving process.
• Chamoda has leaned heavily on his faith, friends, family, and various support organizations.
• After meeting a woman who lost 2 children to a car crash, Chamoda was able to put things into perspective.
• Even 6 years later, it doesn’t feel real to Chamoda, it feels like someone is missing.
• Chamoda found it difficult to engage with other people, staying away from family functions and gatherings.
• If you have other children or people that depend on you, it’s important to find some level of normalcy again.
• Giving back through Chamoda’s Candy Cafe and Chamoda’s foundation has helped Chamoda heal.
• Right now more than ever, people all over the world need support and care from anyone that can give it.
• Chamoda’s 2 daughters and wife have all dealt with Chamoda’s death in different ways.
• When tragedy first strikes, it’s like the rainy season in April and it moistens up your heart to bloom in May.
• It’s important to plant the right things, love, support, passion, during the initial phase of grieving.
• Chamoda understood that it was a slippery slope to turn to a path of destructive behavior if grief is not handled correctly.
• For about 2 months after his son died, Chamoda couldn’t open the bible.
• Chamoda is comforted by knowing that as a tissue donor, Chamoda’s death was able to help many people.
• The local driver’s ed has incorporated Chamoda’s organ and tissue donation into its program.
• It’s hard for men to speak about their grief, but it’s important to find someone to talk to about their feelings.
• Men feel that they have to be so strong for the family but that doesn’t mean they can’t let it out somewhere else.
• Around the holidays, it’s important to find different ways to express your grief.
• Chamoda helped more than 30 people as a tissue and cornea donor.
• When his son died, Chamoda felt like an infant that just needed to be held.
• Have patience with those in your life that has lost someone; eventually, it will slow down, but for now, listen.

 

3 Key Points:

1. Chamoda likens his journey of grief to that of a baby’s journey of learning to walk. Right now, he is holding onto the banister as he guides his feet.
2. Giving back to other people out there that are hurting can help someone heal and get through their own grief.
3. Chamoda’s organ and tissue donation, now a part of their local driver’s ed video, has helped encourage others to become donors.

 

Resources Mentioned:

• LifeCenter (website) (Facebook) (Instagram) (YouTube) (Twitter)
• Andi Johnson (website) (LinkedIn)
• Chamoda’s Candy Cafe (website, Facebook)
• What's Your Grief
• Grief In Common
• Refuge In Grief
• The Center for Loss